7 Types of Men to Avoid: Red Flags to Watch Out For

Dr. Serenity

Mind Health

April 14, 2023

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Upon meeting a man, it is easy to fall for his charm and attractive qualities. However, not all men are worth the investment. Some are adept at luring you in, only to break your heart and leave you feeling frustrated. In this article, we will discuss the seven types of men to avoid when dating.

Dating Mistake #1: Mr. Perennial Bachelor

Who he is: This man is smart, charming, successful, and his kisses make your heart melt. You may wonder why he has not been married yet. He will likely convince you that you are the one he has been searching for. But be warned, he has no intention of settling down with anyone.

How he’ll lure you in: Mr. Perennial Bachelor will tell you that he has yet to find the right woman, and you could be her.

Spot him before you’re hooked: He will not introduce you to his friends or family and will avoid fully integrating you into his life. His last significant relationship was back in college, and all subsequent relationships have lasted no longer than a few months.

Dating Mistake #2: Mr. Marry-Go-Round

Who he is: Unlike Mr. Perennial Bachelor, this man wants to get married – and often does. However, he treats marriage like a lease on a luxury car, trading in his spouse for a newer model every few years.

How he’ll lure you in: He is a master at romancing, making dating feel like a permanent honeymoon.

Spot him before you’re hooked: Find out how many times he has been married. If he has been married more than once or twice, he is likely to do it again. Another warning sign is if you suggest slowing things down and he gets impatient, treating you as an obstacle to his next conquest.

Dating Mistake #3: Mr. No-Money Bags

Who he is: He is a man with Champagne tastes on a beer budget and is often financially irresponsible. He looks for women who are financially stable to support him.

How he’ll lure you in: He will play on your nurturing instincts and make you feel needed.

Spot him before you’re hooked: He will avoid paying when it is his turn, always coming up with excuses for not having enough money.

Dating Mistake #4: Mr. Mama’s Boy

Who he is: He loves his mom. That’s sweet. But he loves her a little too much, and you’re not going to take a backseat to her, no matter how great her Sunday gravy is. “His mom is the center of his universe,” says relationship expert Lisa Daily, author of Stop Getting Dumped!

How he’ll lure you in: He’s charming, he’s attentive, he’s complimentary and he’s always there for you. And then one day, you realize that he’s always there for her, too. He can’t make a decision without consulting her first, and if she disapproves of you – even for something as trivial as the way you cut your hair – it’s game over.

Spot him before you’re hooked: Listen to the way he talks about his mom. If he puts her on a pedestal and can’t say anything negative about her, he’s not ready to break the apron strings. Another tip-off? He’ll compare you to her constantly. “It’s really a competition,” Daily says. “And you’re not going to win.”

Dating Mistake #5: Mr. Peter Pan Syndrome

Who he is: Mr. Peter Pan Syndrome may be in his 30s or 40s, but he still behaves like a frat boy. He believes life is one big party and he’s the amiable host. He is a regular at all the local bars, has no clue about investing, and is always game for a trip to Vegas. However, if you find yourself in a tough situation, such as a car accident or job loss, he will be nowhere to be found. He is not equipped to handle difficult situations, and when the going gets tough, you will be on your own.

How he’ll lure you in: His spontaneity and sense of adventure will appeal to the child in you. He will convince you to go on a parasailing adventure in Cancun or to play hooky from work for an afternoon at the ballpark.

Spot him before you’re hooked: He has not taken on any major responsibilities yet. While his buddies have settled down with mortgages, marriages, and even children, he is still free to do as he pleases. When it comes to dating, he prefers to keep things casual and fun. The phrase “let’s keep things light” is his motto. Eventually, Peter Pans will grow up, but some may become Perennial Bachelors (see above).

Dating Mistake #6: Mr. Narcissist

Who he is: Mr. Narcissist is the king of self-love. He’s charming, charismatic, and always looks good. But when it comes to empathy or consideration for others, he’s lacking. His needs, wants, and opinions come first, and he expects you to agree with him. He’s always right and can’t tolerate any criticism.

How he’ll lure you in: His charm and confidence can be intoxicating. He’ll lavish you with attention, compliments, and gifts. He’ll make you feel like the center of his world, but only as long as you feed his ego.

Spot him before you’re hooked: Pay attention to how he talks about himself. Does he dominate conversations, interrupt, or dismiss your opinions? Does he seem uninterested in your feelings or experiences? Does he put down or criticize others?

Another red flag is his need for constant admiration. “If he’s always fishing for compliments or posting selfies on social media, that’s a sign of a narcissistic personality,” says therapist Margalis Fjelstad, author of “Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist.”

Finally, watch out for his lack of empathy. “If he can’t understand or acknowledge your feelings, that’s a problem,” Fjelstad says. “A healthy relationship requires empathy, respect, and compromise.”

If you’re dating a narcissist, you may feel drained, anxious, or insecure. It’s important to set boundaries and prioritize your own needs. If he’s unwilling or unable to change, it may be time to walk away.

Dating Mistake #7: Mr. Control Freak

Are you feeling like you’re in a suffocating embrace with your date? Does he seem to dictate everything from where you go to eat to how you spend your free time? If so, you may be dating a Mr. Control Freak.

Who he is: Mr. Control Freak is the kind of man who wants to have complete control over every aspect of your life. He will start by making suggestions about where to go and what to do, but eventually he will try to dictate everything, from your wardrobe to your behavior.

It’s important to note that this behavior is not just about being controlling – it’s a sign of a deeper psychological issue. Mr. Control Freak is often insecure and anxious, and he tries to gain a sense of control over his life by controlling yours.

How he’ll lure you in: At first, Mr. Control Freak’s attention may seem flattering. He may shower you with compliments and attention, taking care of you and wanting to be with you all the time. You may feel like he’s truly in love with you and just wants to make sure you’re happy.

Spot him before you’re hooked: However, as time goes on, you’ll start to notice that he’s trying to get you to be someone you’re not. He’ll insist on orchestrating all your dates and tell you how to dress or act around his friends. You’ll begin to feel like you’re losing your sense of self and wonder where you went.

According to psychotherapist Kaiser, “He’s trying to get you to be who you’re not. One day you wake up and you’re like, ‘Where did I go? I don’t even know what I like to eat anymore!'”

It’s important to remember that you don’t have to change who you are to be in a relationship. If you notice these red flags early on, it’s best to walk away before you get too invested. A healthy relationship should be built on mutual respect and trust, not control and manipulation.